It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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