are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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