in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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