HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
