real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
third nipple confirmed
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
