He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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