Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize