I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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