a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize