Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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