I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
