garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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