I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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