i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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