Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
