too bad you live with your parents still
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
We smell like vodka and hangover
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