Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
