I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
