So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
