I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
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