windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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