and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
