I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
