Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
