Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize