operation harelip BJ is a go
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
