Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
We got so high we made milksteak
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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