I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
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