I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
