Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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