True but thats because hes a fetus.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
