Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
