I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
