that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize