covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
