I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
