I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
