I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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