Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize