You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
God gave him joint rollers for hands
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
