Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
