im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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