I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
