"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize