i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Randomize
