they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize