Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Randomize