We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
