i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
