i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Randomize
