At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize