How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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